TIPS Cats! All Russian version - free translation of the original English language ("little book of etiquette for cats")
1. Always licking after eating.
2. Take care of the tail from the ovens, candles, lighted cigarettes, doors, dishwashers, children, chairs, rocking chairs and dogs. God gave you only one tail, take care of it.
3. When in doubt, pursue anything.
4. Fuck what other cats think of you. Remember that successful at life a cat - Those over whom they laughed, mocked and pins when they were kittens.
5. Be adored.
6. Beware of car engines.
7. Stay away to open windows during a hurricane, and then blow away.
8. Scared someone hiding in a basket for dirty clothes.
9. Avoid the temptation to spend all day in anticipation of birds, Nezha in the sun.
10. Christmas trees are created in order to climb over them.
11. Learn to recognize the sound sypyaschihsya cereal, milk is usually followed.
12. Prolonged drowsiness never goes out of fashion.
13. Say "no" cat mint.
14. Do not eat antifreeze, tinsel, broken Christmas decorations, sharp pins, paper clips, weird pills lying on the bathroom floor, poliesterin and mice that could eat rat poison.
15. Do no personal hygiene in public places.
16. Forgive your enemies, but first, "Pound them a couple of times.
17. Never go to a vet who does not keep a cat.
18. Never go back to the vet which discusses their personal problems, measuring your temperature.
19. Make sure that the toilet lid is closed before you jump on it.
20. Remember, no matter how much they love you, all human individuals specialize in their sight.
21. Never go to bed with a heavy heart and a dirty face.
22. Be extremely mysterious.
23. I always between toes.
24. When it is depressed or confused, try to lie back on the floor and raise your legs up. Sometimes the world looks better upside down.
25. Stay away from the diving board.
26. It does not matter what you have done, always try to blame it on the dog.
27. Sniff each stranger.
28. Never go to sleep in a parked car - you can wake up and discover that you were taken away from home.
29. Snowy days pressed to someone someone you love.
30. Go to sleep in the beds to stay cool during the hot summer days.
31. Helps to collect puzzle.
32. Fear like the plague, any person who at least once Last year, miss you and squeezed.
33. For fun sometimes sleep in a drawer for linen.
34. Remember that every chick you met there mother, which you'll break the heart if you eat it.
35. When a friend wants to lick you, let him.
36. Never thought about the past. If you come such a thought, Look carefully at the people. They do this all the time - whether they be happy?
37. Be a friend to the people who have experienced grief, rejection, humiliation, financial loss or a recent illness. In moments of personal tragedy of human beings want to hide from everyone. Learn from their mistakes.
38. Never let anyone clean your teeth dental floss, as long as you do not lose consciousness or die.
39. Avoid cleaners.
40. Never long pondered, sitting on the electric wires.
41. Not Play in plastic bags.
42. Always start the day with sipping.
43. Do not sleep too close to the mantelpiece, when there is a fire.
44. Remember that for foxes, owls and skunks are always the last word in any conflict.
45. Reject cat clothes.
46. Try to convince a dog that you are a lion cub, who will return avenge you, even when you grow up.
47. Never eat raw meat or leftovers. Always ask yourself: if people do not feed their children this, why you should it is?
48. Never sit or sleep on the microwave when they are working. You never know what she can do with you.
49. Never try to push through head in the hole, from which his mustache you can easily not vynesh.
50. Do not get caught people's feet, because they are not looking at their feet.
51. Avoid wasps, bees and spiders.
52. Do not Eat lest claws.
53. Hammer on any talk about that cat indifferent, immoral, evil, stupid and hypocritical. People who believe in such nonsense, often themselves indifferent, immoral, evil, stupid and hypocritical.
54. Run away and hide when you hear a group of people discussing, whether cats always fall on their feet.
55. Stay away from the rain.
56. Stay away from the snow.
57. Sought out good places for pryatok.
58. Look both ways before you cross the street. Never break away from the site. And the best of them did not pass.
59. When to climb trees, never satisfied with the lower branch. However, remember that firefighters is the case for more important than shoot cats from trees. If you get stuck, it's your problem.
60. Do not waste time on TV.
61. Control your anger.
62. Designate the territory, but is not fond of her mark.
63. Is different from a pair of shoes from the litter box.
64. To climb the curtains, to develop the muscles of the upper body.
65. Never let anyone dye your hair a funny color, or do you fancy hairdo.
66. Loudly protest if someone offers to have a puppy.
67. Pay no attention to their mistakes.
68. Regularly scratched his ears.
69. Posing for photos.
70. Take a bath with one another.
71. Learn to see everything, even with closed eyes.
72. Always looks surprised when something will break or break it, even if you did it on purpose.
73. Hold the temptation to give to someone a dead mouse or bird. Your opinion about the perfect gift that someone can not share.
74. Do not waste time showing off in front of a mirror.
75. Do not waste time on search for meaning in life.
76. Make friends with the milkman.
77. Helps with the removal of jewelry, even if you no one asks.
78. Do not act under the influence of impulses of envy, even if they seem fair at the moment.
79. Avoid passive smoking.
80. Do not wait until Christmas to open presents.
81. Do not just inhabited the house, become his soul.
82. Develop a memorable "Meow!»
83. Never run through just washed the floor. You could slip and hit.
84. Sleep on your answering machine.
85. Not the Sui people in the face of their private parts, even if you think you know them well.
86. Do not cry over spilled milk - better vylakay it.
87. Always sleep under the blanket. People will never get you out of the house, if you prizhmeshsya to them under the blanket.
88. Lie quietly on any jacket, sweater or blouse, as she down on a chair.
89. Do not waste time learning the things that you will do for others.
90. Trust your instincts.
91. Always enters the room balanced and confident. If you accidentally poskolzneshsya or stumble, stop immediately. Start licking themselves with a serious look - it diverts attention.
92. Learn distinguish the sound of the opening of the usual cans and cans of cat food.
93. If someone breaks into the house when it is unoccupied, the hide. Leave a heroic dog.
94. Remember, everyone loves when they were awakened with a kiss.
95. Never sleep alone.
96. Sleep under the desk lamps.
97. Sleep in the middle of the corridor.
98. Autumn leaves and newspapers came up with to play them.
99. Sleep in the sun is the best medicine, what would you not bothered.
100. Be someone's best friend for life.
